It seems as if the only way of being able to operate with any sense of peaceful operation in the moment is with a kind of stoic detachment. But it’s a kind of mode that is detached from a sense of control of, investment into, and mirror reflection from another rational agent.
We cannot control anyone, what they say, what they do, what they think, etc. So having expectations seems to be irrational, and a positioning of oneself for disappointment.
We can invest our time, money, prayers, good will, education, and charity into another person, and it can all be a waste. It could all be tossed to the birds, and spat on, rejected. Perhaps the outcome is not what mattered, whether or not it was a success, but whether or not the one who did all the investment was doing so virtuously. The Passion of Christ seems to resonate with this, God did the penultimate investment into us, and it is rejected liberally, and with enthusiasm.
Finally, the generations after us are not reflections or mirrors of us. They may reflect our exterior looks, but not the soul. No, it seems as if each individual soul, is actually an image of God, therefore, it cannot be possible for the soul to directly reflect the labor of the parents, for the soul was not generated from the parents, but from God. The rational human only assumes physical traits from the parents, and nothing more.
Therefore, it seems reasonable, for the sake of not losing one’s sanity, to guide, and invest into our children as best as one possibly can, with the understanding that we are not peering into absolute reciprocal mirrors of us, but rather observing souls who are, or are not oriented to the One whose image their soul bears. This seems to necessitate a certain amount of detachment in order to execute.
EAR